Sunday, June 16, 2013

Happy Father's Day, Dad a testimony to you!

Dad, although you left us way to soon (1991) there is hardly a day that goes by that I do not think of you!  When I was a little girl you were everything to me; I loved your laugh,  I loved your attention and I loved how you made your children feel like they were the most important thing in your life.  Then I watched things change and I didn't like the changes because I didn't understand, why!  Now I have put the pieces together..the changes occurred when you found out about things that were happening with your little girls that were out of your control and yes you did stop them but it cost you allot and I am so sorry.  I now know that you had to take care of your children, and you did but it ate you up inside and that is why you turned to alcohol and lost interest in life..I wished I could have helped you through it but I was too little to understand what it did to you inside.  I blamed you for all the changes that you created and all the hurt I felt because you drank and became bitter.  But I do not blame you anymore for now I understand, why... It does not ease the pain that you let alcohol take you from us way too soon but it helps me understand that the burdens you had to face where far greater then what you could comprehend.  So in saying this I want to let you know that you are missed by all your children very much...we hear a certain laugh and turn to see who it is because it reminds us of you...You have given us all the gift of life, you taught us to always stand by our children and do right by them, to right a wrong at any cost, to be faithful to our family  and although you had to take refuge in a bottle because you stood by your girls and lost relationships with some of your family members, through that we have gained the power of survival.  I am no longer bitter Daddy that you chose the bottle over us for now I understand it was way too much for you to bear.  So on this Father's Day please know that I love you, I miss you and you are forever in my heart!
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